Slam Poetry.

Because it’s stunning. And it reminds me that I’m not the only one who feels. Pain. Love. Anger. Joy. Frustration. Fear. Acceptance. Confusion. Until people thrust their raw, personal feelings out into the air for everyone to hear, it’s easy to forget that we’re all the same. Emotional. Searching for answers to things that are bigger than ourselves, bigger than the world. And realizing that there aren’t always answers, or answers that we like.

This evening, I found myself participating in my first ever poetry slam, along with a handful of other students. I was nervous, shaking, jittery. But not because I was afraid to speak in front of an audience. I was more scared to see their reactions, firsthand, as the words spilled from my lips and fell on their ears. I’ve never been able to disclose my true emotions to many people, and doing exactly that in front of a room full of strangers was intimidating. What if they judge me? What if they laugh? What if they don’t understand, and cast me off? 

But once my name was called and I was forced in front of the microphone, my poems just slipped out. I forgot about the audience, about the judges, about everything, and read like no one was watching. Before I realized what was happening it was over, and I was back in my seat. My friends complimented me, the strangers clapped for me, the other poets greeted me afterwards with warm handshakes and I’m glad I met you’s. It was exhilarating, like I was jolted in status. Like I was more than just another student. Like I meant something to someone. Though I didn’t win, the whole experience was gratifying. 

Before this, I knew seldom about Slam Poetry and the things that came part and parcel with it. I hadn’t realized an entire community of people, all willing and happy to know your name, was part of the deal. It amazes me that everyone is so accepting, even of someone who has never done it before. I enjoy feeling like a member of something larger than myself. Because it helps me remember that I’m not the only one here.